God and me

I have always shared a very special relationship with God. I believe in his existence. I feel his presence all the time. But I keep getting suspicious about the tall claims people make about his capabilities and powers. Is he that good? Is he that dependable? Whatever ...

Okay so who is God to me? Honestly speaking, I find him a nice guy. He has noble intents. But he is kind of busy all the time. And in fact a bit lost all the time. He created a unique species called humans which he thought would be his best creation ever with the fine qualities and powers he bestowed on them. But it was an experiment which did not quite go right. The humans, despite being the fine species they are, got something which wreaked havoc. They got aware of the monster powers of brain and a misplaced belief that they could actually make God redundant by using this power. From then on, they have kept this very powerful but nice and adorable powerful person called God on his toes !

But regardless of the fact that he too had his share of failures, I look at God as a very special person in my life. He is a cool dude. Has a square chin and broad shoulders. An aquiline nose with gentle smile on the lips and a twinkle in his eyes. And though he never showed, I am sure he has a decent six pack too. But he is too shy to flaunt it. He is a completely chilled out guy. He does not have a halo, but greets me always with a Hello in his deep baritone voice which is husky at times. And he is a bit laid back. When I have a morning cup of tea, he sits next to me. Like me, he too loves the ginger tea and gets tempted with its aroma. And like me, he is also a person who loves listening to lounge music and enjoy his solitude. But I really do not know why he suddenly vanishes from the scene when I get into my daily grind. Is that when he also gets into his daily grind? Perhaps true. I guess his hands are always full with daily issues. So I let him be. Most of the time. He has a sense of humor too and can laugh at himself. I love pulling his leg when the world of his own creation is in a chaotic mess. I call him Go(o)d for nothing in such situations. And he smiles. And lets me have a laugh at his expense. Then I tell him - It is okay to fail as a God sometimes. After all , God is a human too !! And he is chilled out about such comments. He never takes his God status too seriously to feel angry over the digs. I wonder what he does in the afternoon hours. Enjoy his afternoon siesta? Or I suspect I may as well find him chilling out in a pub enjoying a mug of beer with a Havana cigar lit in his hands. I am sure he has great taste even in his choice of the vices that he has !

He has an impeccable choice of clothes too. He does not dress up in the yellow dhoti that those 5000 year old stories describe him wearing. Nor does he have any snakes clinging to his body. Does not even put the peacock feather on his forehead. He has a fine collection of tweed suits and silk ties which he wears when sitting silently next to me during my business presentations. When I am nervous, he just pats reassuringly on my back and goes missing. And I get my confidence back. But if he does not turn up in time before the presentation, I give him an earful in case I land in a mess. He does not mind all that. Tells me, he had to pat the backs of some 6 billion and counting people all over. So little glitches are expected. Learn to survive without me. You can do well without me ! And I understand. It is very human to be a God :-). He does not carry the bows or the arrows, the spears or the swords or the axe or the tridents for a weapon. But I am sure he secretly carries his 9 mm pistol inside the pocket of his waist coat. Just makes sure, he does not scare me off :-)

But sometimes I feel God would have been better as a woman. He is a great guy. But there is something missing. He delivers but ... What if this great friend of mine would have been a woman? I wonder what she would be dressed up like. A saree? Yes. That she will be nicely draped in a Kerala style white saree with a golden border? I love that idea. Even a black saree with golden zari work would be terrific. Or may be a white saree with a red border like those Bengali beauties wear. Anything is fine. But I am also ok with having my God wearing blue denims with a white tee. Especially when I want to catch up with her in later afternoon tea breaks. And she should have those rectangular black rimmed spectacles to add to her style and class. Occasionally a business suit would be a great idea. My friends would call me crazy. But I am sure my woman God will look like that. And beyond the looks, I want her to be different in a special way. She may still go missing from during my daily grind and can choose to stay away for long time. But she has to be around when my fellow humans inflict wounds to my heart and soul. She is the God into whose lap I want to sink my head and hide my tears when the world falls apart. She is the God who would run her gentle fingers through my hair and softly but firmly make me stand up for myself when I am nursing a bruised soul. She is the God who would make me keep the glass of wine aside and look for solace in her kind eyes. She would be the first who would give me a warm embrace and plant the most affectionate kiss on my forehead when I am numb with pain. And she will be free of the glitches which my man God does. After all she is a woman. She can deftly multi-task and yet smile. And tell me - It is ok to fail sometimes. But you can still make it ! And I will, eventually ...

For those of you who do not believe it can happen, you are wrong. Even God needs to be a woman to do his job better. And she will appear someday. I am waiting. And I still continue to love my God who is a man. He is the dude who makes me feel good about myself. He is my bro who often punches me on my shoulders and tells me - Tension mat le yaar ! And I love him !!